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Beer Goggles

It has always been a widely held belief that alcohol clouds peoples judgement and more especially makes them look at everything through “Rose Tinted Spectacles,” or "Beer Goggles." However, a report by the University of Leicester, that was recently published, concluded that alcohol consumption does not inflate the perceived attractiveness of somebody. In fact the general results showed that alcohol actually made other people appear less attractive in the eye of the beholder. The report found that people who had drunk some alcohol consistently overestimated the age of the girls in the test pictures by an average of 3.5 years. (240 members of the public were approached in bars and cafés, asked to look at photographs of ten young women aged 17, and asked to rate their attractiveness. Some of the photos had been digitally altered to give the faces a younger or older appearance and some of the girls had used make-up in some of the pictures. 50% of the participants had drunk some alcohol before the test and their blood-alcohol level had been measured by a breathalyser test to confirm that.)

Perhaps the following couple of jokes should now be relegated to the archives;-

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman. A date rape drug on the market called "Beer" is used by many females to target unsuspecting men. 
The drug is generally found in liquid form and is now available almost anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, from taps and in large kegs. "Beer" is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and have sex with them. 
Typically, a woman needs only to persuade a guy to consume a few units of "Beer" and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex. Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several "Beers," men will often succumb to desires to perform sexual acts on horrific women to whom they would never normally be attracted. 
After drinking "Beer" men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that: "something bad" occurred. At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as "a relationship." It has been reported that in extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as "marriage." 
Apparently, men are much more susceptible to this scam after "Beer" is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.
If you fall victim to this insidious "Beer" and the predatory women administering it, there are male support groups with venues in every town where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter in an open and frank manner with similarly affected, like-minded guys. For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the yellow pages.

A husband and wife were out shopping in the local supermarket when the husband placed a large multi-pack of 12 cans of beer into their trolley. His wife immediately said, "Put that back we can't afford it."
So the husband reluctantly obeyed. A little further on his wife picked up a large tub of beauty cream priced at £20 and put it in the trolley. Her husband said, "If we can't afford my beer, we can't afford your cream."
His wife replied, "You want me to look beautiful don't you?"
To which her husband responded, "Yes of course, but after 12 cans of beer you will look more beautiful to me and the beer only costs £10!

 

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